I want to move on but every time you come home, you shake the house with insecurities. This isn’t a house built on lies but it is far from a house built on love. Maybe it is built on love but it definitely isn’t the purest. Let’s make it pure. Reverse that anger into calmness, transform that sadness into the smile it used to be. All emotions stem from the same source of love, when we feel lost come back to love. When our emotion doesn’t feel right, remember the creator, the originator, love!
There were countless times I could recall where I wanted to put my weight on you. I thought you were supposed to be my glue to hold me together. As I obsessively watched you drift away, I fell apart. Illusions ran through my mind as I waited desolately for you to come back and save me. Save me from the terrors in my own bead. The same terrors that pushed you away in the first place, leaving you at a disadvantage from the start. You tried to love me as I laid in bed trapped, victim to my past. You tried painting me a future but my mind wouldn’t let me see your beautiful art. You were always the purest form of love. Thank you for pushing me, thank you for allowing me to understand what love feels like, thank you for showing me that the same feeling is possible without you. I love you, forever.